not quite a recurring dream

I have dreamt about my grandfather, (my dad's father) several times since he died in 1998 and each time the dreams were quite vivid and have lingered in my memory.

One of the first dreams I had of him was this… There was a family gathering which was during the day at my childhood home.  Everyone was having a good time, I was sitting with my camera looking at the photos I had just taken. My grandfather came and sat next to me, I looked up at him and asked 'Dada, howcome you are here?' He said he is just visiting. I said please can I take a photo of us together and held the camera pointing it towards the 2 of us. I said come, you can see the photo now on the digital camera. When I looked at it, it was just me. I asked him howcome he did not come come out in the photo. He didn't answer.

The dream I had last week of him was this… I was in a room full of people, it was busy. I see a man across the room in a suit well-dressed. I look at him and the more I look, the more he resembles someone I know. I continue to look at him from across the room, the more I look the more his features seems to change in front me as if I am looking at someone who is not really who they appear to be. He eyes catch mine and he stares straight at me. I mouth out 'Dada, is that you?'. He hears me some how. Suddenly we are face to face. There is a lot of energy and it feels as if something is about to happen. I raise my hands and say something out loud in a language that I do not understand. At that moment, he does the same but says something else in the same language. Everything stop around us. It is just us. We look at each other.

Now, the dream I had of him in the early hours of this morning was this… Wondering through a house, not sure which house this was. I am aware of the rest of family in other parts of this house. I walk into one of the rooms and on the bed laying down just as he used to when I went to visit him in the afternoons. He looks just as he used to only a little older than the last time I saw him. I ask 'How can you be here?' He says that he is using someone else's body but we are able to speak and I see his face because I want to see his face. He stands up and I hold him and say that I've been dreaming about him often. He said he has been dreaming about me too. I want to ask him questions, but my mind is racing and I cannot hold on to any thoughts long enough.  I ask him where what he has been doing and he tells me what but I don't understand what it is. I want to ask him if I will ever be happy… but I know I can't ask him that, how would he know… I wake up.

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